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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Getting "Real"

Sunday morning, just before we rolled out of my hometown after a weekend visit with my mother, I took a leisurely moment to read the local newspaper. I like to do this when I am back home. Usually, it takes about 30 seconds to go cover to cover. Mostly, those 30 seconds revolve around the obituary section....

Anyway, this particular day it took an entire MINUTE to read the Sunday edition because an old friend of mine has a column on Sunday and I like to read it since I know her, blah, blah, blah. Her column is a lot like this blog, but she is getting paid to do it. Sigh.

Her topic really hit a nerve with me....I am still thinking about it....and since confession is good for the soul - here it goes!

Her topic? Artificial Christmas trees.

She is against them.

They are (among many other things) BAD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. It turns out, they are made from petroleum or something. Apparently, they last not only several Christmas seasons, but several millennium as well.

Sigh.

I suppose you know where this is going???

Yup.

I have an artificial Christmas tree. Paid a pretty penny for it, too.

I wish I could say that it was because of allergies. I wish I could say it was because I won it in a contest or something. I wish I could say that I was forced at gunpoint to order it - or else.

I ordered it because I am a perfectionist. It ruins my Christmas when my bazillion dollar, 10 foot, fraser fir is DEAD before the last advent candle is lit.

Before the artificial tree, I had to sleep with a fire extinguisher in one hand and the "dirt devil" in the other!

We live in South Carolina, for Pete's sake! It was 75 degrees today. We put our trees up before Thanksgiving!! How much can you ask of a freshly cut tree?

I gave my real tree aspirin. I gave it fresh water. Once, I went to the mountains and cut down my tree and brought it home and gave it aspirin and it still died before Christmas....little pieces of its' DNA were all over my floor, under my rug, in my hair, my sheets and ugh, EVERYWHERE!

I used to be a real tree "snob". Real tree snobs...you know who you are.....

I crossed over.

I like my artificial tree and I am really sorry about the environment. I didn't know.

People think it is real.


And it is real, to me....in my heart.

There are some really good arguments against artificial trees. For me, the main one being that my 7 year son has no memories of going to the tree lot and searching for "the one".

He does, however, have memories of me "fluffing" my artificial tree and lighting the pine scented candle and going to bed happy. Happy. Day after holiday day after holiday day.

Just saying.

~J

2 comments:

  1. As a former real tree snob who has moved to the South, I hear ya girl!

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  2. Hi I'm Denise, I'm a real tree snob. And It's a pain, but I love the smell!! Thanks for all your wonderfully amusing blogs!!

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